BIG D PITCHAS PRESENTS:
THE TOP TEN BEST MOVIES OF 2007 THAT I SAW
by Diego Kontarovsky

This Top Ten Movies of 2007 list is unlike any other Top Ten Movies of 2007 list you will read.  How?

1. I go by the movie's ultimate quality, but I also judge them based on how they impacted me.  If a movie just hit me in the right spot for a reason that is stupid and inexplicable, it moves way up in the list.  Even if the movie itself is not very good in a vacuum.  This ain't no vacuum.  This is my list.  And don't take that as a preemptive excuse for my including bad movies.  I never include bad movies, ever.  So fuck you!

2. I occasionally have more than ten entries.  I do not see this as a top ten list, plus extra entries.  I see all the entries as a collective embodiment of my "top ten."  Looking only at the ten highest entries of my overall list would be less correct than looking at all of them as the top ten.  It's simple mathematical proportionality.

3. I only rank the movies that I saw.  Some people will tell you they liked Into the Wild, or Before the Devil Knows You're Dead.  I won't tell you that, because I didn't see those movies.  I think I will probably see them eventually, but because I yet haven't, they will not be reflected on this list.  Nor will some others.  So if you really liked a movie and it's not on the list, it's either because I didn't see it, or I saw it, but I liked Alpha Dog more.

I should also say that the way I put this list together is kinda illogical.  Some entries I don't even have to think about.  I know where they go in the list.  Others, I agonize over and change a hundred times before finally abandoning them in their spots (the top five or so movies, for example, could each easily have been the #1 movie if someone asked me at different points during the year).  This also means that the order of the entries on my list is always very haphazard.  Sometimes I'll narrow the list down to a select few, then realize I want to talk about more movies, and I'll extend the list by cherry picking four or five more using totally different criteria than I used to make the initial list.  As a result, I tend to leave out some real gems.  So let me just briefly honor the movies I should have included in my list of The Top Ten Best Movies of 2006 That I Saw, but for some reason, didn't.

1. Cars.  This one got eliminated early on when I was trying to narrow the list to a proper ten, and ignored when I eventually beefed up the roster.  Also, it took a second viewing for me to realize most of its merits.  Cars is funny and beautiful and awesome (and, incidentally, is also the exact same movie as Doc Hollywood).
2. Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World.  I did mention this in the list when I was discussing entry #12 (Scoop), but it completely deserved its own spot, and I blew it.  Part of the reason was that I saw it in like January of that year, and had forgotten how fucking brilliant it was by the time I wrote the list.

So, sorry to those two guys, and I guess a few others.  I am admittedly an imperfect human being.  I try to be as good as I can, but I often fail.  Yes, it's part of my charm, but it also means I can't always compose lists with the knowledge and attention they deserve.

Now enjoy this, the most accurate list you will ever read.


Yeah, 29 this year.  My memories of Alpha Dog are very hazy because it was the first 2007 movie I saw in all of 2007.  It involves a true story about these suburban thug kids who kidnap a guy's little brother and hold him as collateral for the money he owes.  It's full of great performances, including Ben Foster as the craziest fucker in the universe.

As with any movie based on true stories, I emphatically recommend avoiding any knowledge of said true story until after you see the movie.  It's just more effective that way.  Imagine if you didn't know about the Titanic before you saw that movie.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Alpha Dog.

By the way, this year I'm putting links to all the movies on Amazon, so you can buy them if you want.  If you use my link, a small commission will be paid to me, so you will actively be affecting my life in a positive way.  Plus, you get the movie.


I don't think that either of these movies would have made this list individually.  But together, they create something wonderful.  I am coupling them because they are both about normal people being driven to vigilantism (which is one of my favorite things).  They are, however, remarkably different in how they go about themselves.

The Brave One is a very modern, laid-back take on the premise that allows the consequences to escalate in a very realistic and fascinating way without ever spoiling the fun.  Whereas Death Sentence is a very filthy, gritty portrait of exactly what you expect, with a few things thrown in that maybe you didn't.  Saw's James Wan also gives us some visually tasty action scenes.  And with sinewy leads like Foster and Bacon, I don't think I even have to mention what else about both these movies is great.

Wanna own 'em?  Click here to buy The Brave One, and here to buy Death Sentence.


Enchanted is about a stereotypical cartoon princess named Giselle who is banished from her magical animated world by an evil witch and sent to a horrible dimension known to us as the real world.

More cartoon characters follow her out, and it is lots of fun to watch these old storybook archetypes comically clash with the universal laws and inhabitants of the modern-day New York.  Like how any time Giselle finds herself in need of a change of clothes, her automatic response is to slap together a new dress out of curtains.  It is this worlds-colliding sense of humor that makes Enchanted worth seeing.  Kind of like 1998's surprising Pleasantville, only not quite as heavy and without all the racism.

There was some Oscar buzz over Amy Adams' performance as the princess Giselle, and every word of it was well-deserved.  She is the physical embodiment of an animated singing princess.  Speaking of which, the songs in this movie are by the legendary Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz, who, in the world of Disney animated musicals, are essentially the equivalent of gods.  So, I mean.  If there's an ounce of magic left in your jaded, blackened souls, you will enjoy this movie.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Enchanted.  And click here to buy the triple-Oscar-nominated Enchanted Soundtrack!  Damn that's good!


Ben Affleck co-wrote, co-produced, and directed this adaptation of a novel by Dennis Lehane (Mystic River, Shutter Island).  I've forgotten most of the details of this movie, but I seem to recall it being a very authentic noir thriller about an investigator (Casey Affleck) and his life/business partner (Michelle Monaghan) trying to help find a young girl who is gone baby gone.

Between this and The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, this was the best year of Casey Affleck's entire fucking life.  And I just love Michelle Monaghan, like just because.  Plus, Ed Harris.  So it was good casting, I think.

This movie proves that Ben Affleck is an unfathomably better director than he is a chooser of acting roles.  But then, he had to be.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Gone Baby Gone.  And click here to buy the Dennis Lehane novel, Gone, Baby, Gone (typically you find more commas in books than you do in movies).


I loved the elegant simplicity of this movie.  I also really liked Tommy Lee Jones' character (mainly during the parts when he was defying other people's authority-- which was every goddamn scene!) as well as the overall message of the movie.  I can't think of any reason for anyone reading this not to see it.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy In the Valley of Elah.


Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street is a surprisingly comical opera about an insane barber who spends the entire movie carrying out revenge.  It's like if you took the second half of The Count of Monte Cristo, made the count insane, and everyone sings everything.  That's this movie.

I think my favorite part of this movie was the sickly dark humor that Tim Burton was pretty much born to direct.  I don't mean that in terms of vulgarity or violence, but attitude.  The absurdity in this movie is carried out so casually, it comes over better than your typical ha-ha funny.  Burton's a weird guy, but his sense of humor should be officially recognized as a national treasure.

My brother pointed out that the opening credits of Sweeney Todd are essentially the same opening credits that were in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (the Johnny Depp-starring musical directed by Tim Burton that came out in 2005), but with blood instead of chocolate.  Intentional?

By the way, Hairspray is not on this list.  It was almost certainly the very next movie I was going to add, but 30 seemed like too much for a top ten list.  I guess at this point I will also apologize for cluttering all the musicals down here in the 20's.  I warned you about this list.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.  Or, if your TV's in the shop, you may also enjoy the Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street Deluxe Complete Edition Motion Picture Soundtrack.


Hot Fuzz comes from the same creative team as 2004's Shaun of the Dead.  It stars Simon Pegg as a big city supercop who's reassigned to a piddling little town where crimefighting takes on a new scope.

Or does it?

This movie is a passionate love letter to cop movies, mixed together with a bunch of really funny British guys.  I don't believe Tim Dalton has ever been put to better use.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Hot Fuzz.


This movie is a very interesting take on the Richard Matheson novel of the same name.  It is the book's third feature film adaptation (after 1964's The Last Man on Earth, starring Vincent Price, and 1971's The Omega Man, starring Charlton Heston).  Price.  Heston.  Smith.  How's that for an evolutionary chart of leading men?

The screenplay by Akiva Goldsman and Mark Protosevich cherry-picks details from both the original novel and the movie adaptations, mixed with a lot of new ideas, to make the story as interesting and relevant as possible.  The direction by Francis Lawrence is wisely paced, with a lot of stunning sequences and edge-of-your-seat action mixed in with the quiet bits.  But perhaps the primary reason to see this is Will Smith.

Will Smith is this movie.  As the movie peels back its layers, we start to see our hero in frighteningly different ways, and I just want to keep moving it up the list.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy I Am Legend.  You can also read the original novel of I Am Legend by Richard Matheson.  It is a thousand details different from the movie, but its cover is nevertheless the I Am Legend theatrical poster.


Rescue Dawn is a movie about a fighter pilot trying to survive behind enemy lines.  It's actually just like the movie Behind Enemy Lines, except it has, like, good acting and writing and directing.  It stars Christian Bale and Steve Zahn.  Bale needs no introduction in my Best Movies lists.  I mentioned last year I will see anything he is in, because he is better at acting than you are at anything.  I won't necessarily see anything Zahn is in.  He makes some shitty ones.  He's great in this though, so no worries.  It's written and directed by Werner Herzog, who once made Little Dieter Needs to Fly, which is a documentary version of this exact movie.

Herzog is a good director, and there's plenty to like in this movie.  But I hope we've reached the point, as a people, where seeing the words "Christian Bale" means you immediately stopped reading, put on your shoes, jumped in your car, and ran out to get this DVD, and you're not even reading this sentence right now.  I told you I had links to buy these movies from the comfort of your own home, you dumb shits!

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Rescue Dawn.


Once is a modest little movie about a guy who plays the guitar and a girl who plays the piano, and they meet cute.  You could call it a musical (which I've heard some people do), but the songs happen as they would in real life-- people perform them when appropriate.  No one breaks into song during an argument or fight/dances.  Despite this, or even because of it, the movie totally works.

The songs in Once are quite lovely and sublime.  And that would be enough, but the story that comes with this music bears its same unassuming charm.  It's very rare to see a movie and get the feeling that it is completely uncorrupted by anything.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Once.  And, if so inclined, click here to buy Once: Music from the Motion Picture (Collector's Edition CD/DVD).  That is not the soundtrack that came out in May, but a special edition that came out in December.  It has two extra tracks, plus a DVD with a featurette about the movie and some live performances.  For a movie called Once, they sure put out a lot of shit.


I was a big fan of the original Sleuth, which starred Laurence Olivier in the Laurence Olivier role and Michael Caine in the Michael Caine role.  In this remake, Kenneth Branagh directs, with Michael Caine in the Laurence Olivier role, and Jude Law in the Michael Caine role.  The script has also been completely rewritten by Nobel Prize winner Harold Pinter.

Pinter's changes are particularly notable in the film's second half, and I absolutely loved what he did with it, especially what he seems to very intentionally leave vague.  I won't discuss it in further specifics for those of you who haven't seen it yet (which I suspect is the lot of you).

I suppose some purists will tell you that the changes were unnecessary.  That's all purists ever do!  But I applaud said changes.  Firstly because there should be a reason for remaking a classic (the original is already a great version of itself).  And secondly because they fully build on the original premise, undermining nothing in the process.

I would say there is one thing that the original succeeds at, that this one kinda doesn't.  There was another movie in my list last year that actually had the exact same problem.  But I didn't hold it against that movie, so I won't hold it against this one.  And if anyone ever wants to know what the hell I'm talking about, just ask me outside the confines of my spoiler-free list.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Sleuth.  You can also get yourself the original Sleuth, starring Laurence Olivier and Michael Caine.


Ocean's Eleven is a great ensemble heist movie.  Ocean's Twelve, I think most people can agree, is a good movie, and not entirely devoid of great things in it, but is also not completely worthy of the first (I think it was a preexisting script that the studio rejiggered into an Ocean's sequel).  Ocean's Thirteen was made primarily to correct the misstep of Ocean's Twelve.  I am almost embarrassed to say I don't remember a goddamn thing about this movie.  But let me explain why that's not a bad thing.

I love to be surprised and captured by different moments in movies.  The more I see a movie, the less taken I am by the element of the unknown.  For this reason, if I see a movie I really like, I don't necessarily want to see it again as soon as possible.  I kinda like forgetting how it went about itself, so that the next time I see it, I can have as pure a viewing experience as I did the first time.  So the fact that I've retained almost nothing about this movie is a testament to how much I enjoyed it.

I remember it being funny and cool, just like Ocean's Eleven.  I remember it making much better use of the overall group than Twelve did.  I remember it taking advantage of elements set up in the first two movies, allowing for the kind of payoffs that make sequels worth watching.  And I remember walking out of the theater with the confidence that I could forget everything about it and love it all over again on my next viewing.

Also, I mean the fucking thing came out in June.  I don't even remember what I ate for breakfast today.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Ocean's Thirteen.


It's probably pretty easy for people to toss this movie aside as something silly and irrelevant, because that's what it may look like at first glance.  But if you're going around judging movies based on a first glance, then you are the one who is silly and irrelevant.  I'm going to tell you about this movie now.

For those who don't know, Mr. Bean was a British TV show in the early-to-mid 90's.  Mr. Bean was played by the infinitely brilliant Rowan Atkinson.  The show consisted of almost completely silent sketches where the character of Mr. Bean went about everyday tasks.  The humor was mainly visual, making Mr. Bean accessible to just about anyone in the world.  And it was incidentally one of the funniest shows ever made.  Atkinson is as good with the physical humor of Mr. Bean as he was with the sharp wordplay of his Blackadder series.  There was a Mr. Bean movie in 1997 called Bean.  It involved Mr. Bean staying with a family in America, so there was a lot more dialogue happening generally around Mr. Bean, which I suppose was the biggest difference between that movie and the show.  But it was damn good.

Mr. Bean's Holiday is significantly more faithful to the show's silent visual style and is a wonderful new installment of hilarious predicaments and imaginative outcomes.  Atkinson and company once again craft a work of humor that is both gracefully universal and completely original.

I love how Mr. Bean sketches will occasionally showcase an interesting way for something to be funny.  For example, it's not funny that Mr. Bean disgustingly eats a giant platter full of bizarre seafood.  It's funny that he does so because he doesn't want to offend the waiter who brought it to him.  And the social boundaries he is ironically willing to break just to maintain this premise elevate the scene to comedic greatness.  But that's just one example.  I'm not gonna tell you the whole movie, for free.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Mr. Bean's Holiday.  And click here to buy the original Mr. Bean show.  And click here to buy the first movie, Bean.


The reason Knocked Up was so good was because of its unrelenting competence.

Now, I'm not sure about this because I haven't been alive forever, but was there ever a time when only funny people made comedies?  Or was it always common practice for comedies to get made by unfunny assholes?  We also get a lot of comedies that are somewhat good, yet problematic.  But Knocked Up is the goddamn Apple II.  It just works.

And yes, that's the best metaphor I could come up with for that.

Writer/director Judd Apatow is funny.  All the actors are funny.  The characters are real people, the story is relevant, and the dialogue is filled with insightful little monologues and observations.  Basic comedic sense like this is, sadly, a rare treat.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Knocked Up.


Stardust was a very pleasant surprise.  Going in, I didn't know anything about it, and whatever advertisement I was aware of didn't project any qualities that I would find enticing.  But once the story got going, I found myself really digging the hilariously quirky universe these characters lived in.  Apparently, it's based on a standalone novel by Neil Gaiman.  Kudos to director and co-screenwriter Matthew Vaughn for seemingly preserving what must have been good in the novel.  But I guess it's hard to mess up a movie that contains players like Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert DeNiro, Peter O'Toole, and Ricky Gervais.  Not impossible, I'm sure, but hard.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Stardust.  And click here to buy Neil Gaiman's Stardust.


Each Saw movie should ideally be viewed completely spoiler-free, so I can barely say anything about why this movie is good.  All you're getting is that image, which tells you absolutely nothing.

All four Saws have had something very cool about them, but the cool thing in Saw IV is, by its very nature, unlike the any of the cool things in the first three.  I didn't even comprehend it till I thought about it for a while after seeing the movie, although some may get it instantly.  I was apprehensive about this installment in particular going in, because it's the first one that wasn't co-written by Leigh Whannell.  But it actually flowed very well with the first three.  I love the way this franchise began, and I'm excited about where it's going.  A couple of exceptional performances in here as well.

I bet I sound like a complete jackass to people who hate Saw.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Saw IV.  Though I would recommend waiting until October for the two-disc special edition.


The TV Set is about a writer who fights to retain the integrity of his vision during the making of his TV show pilot.  As a writer, or any kind of artist, or a lover of film or TV, you will find this movie both funny and heartbreaking.  And you will mourn for a fictional television show.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy The TV Set.


Regardless of the source material, 300 is an awesome movie.  I dig the stylized universe, the storytelling of it, and the sweet cast.  But one of the best things about it is how it seems to have preserved the essence of the original comic book.  I've not exactly read 300, but I'm familiar with Frank Miller's writing style, and it felt like Frank Miller as I was watching it.  Like, I recognized his voice.  Which seems to have been director Zack Snyder's primary goal.  I heard that during production, he would be looking at the digital backgrounds and instructing the artists to make the mountains less realistic and more like Frank Miller's art.  This has me hopeful for 2009's Watchmen, which Zack Snyder is directing.  Supposedly, he is using his copy of the Alan Moore masterpiece as a virtual script/storyboard reference, as he seemingly did with 300.  I think it's a great way to capture even just a little of what comic books do and bring something new to the world of film.

You even notice how movie adaptations of comic books are so much more popular and respected than comic book adaptations of movies?  I guess that's because movie comics are more like promotional items than they are actual art, and they have about as much intellectual credibility as a magnet or a t-shirt.  But that doesn't mean they're completely worthless.  I think.

When I went to see 300, it was at an advanced screening in February.  A local comic book shop called Golden Apple Comics invited people to attend on three screening nights; a Thursday, a Friday, and a Saturday.  I went on Friday, when there was a misunderstanding and the 150 people Golden Apple brought in were turned away and asked to come back on Saturday (when they were expecting an additional 150 Golden Apple invitees).  That meant there would be 300 nerds fighting against the odds to get in.  Did they succeed?  I think we can turn to the movie for the answer.  Some of them made it.  A lot of them probably died.  But their spirit will never be forgotten.  I know I got in, cuz I made sure to get there early as fuck.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Zack Snyder's 300 (for watching).  And click here to buy Frank Miller's 300 (for reading).


Much like Knocked Up, there is nothing necessarily groundbreaking happening in this movie.  It is just a bunch of loveable characters having imaginative adventures and sharing real emotions over the course of a very turbulent day.  It is unfortunate that it was so overhyped, because a movie like Superbad deserves to be a pleasant surprise.  Not an overbearing prophecy.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Superbad.


I live, partly, for movies like The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters.  This is a documentary about the battle for the world high score on the Donkey Kong arcade game.  The two main contenders are Steve Wiebe, a humble schoolteacher from Kirkland, Washington, and Billy Mitchell, a narcissistic restaurateur from Hollywood, Florida, who is a video game legend and posturing perfect man.

I've always found video game culture to be one of the most compelling documentary subjects there is, for it can inspire as much passion and drive as anything.  Business.  Politics.  War.  We all pick our battlefields.  These men picked a classic arcade game.  And the characters and events captured by this movie are a true wonder.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters.


Grindhouse was an invaluably unique moviegoing experience.  It was two horror flicks, done in the old shitty quality B-movie "grindhouse" style, complete with carelessly damaged prints and missing reels.  The kind of pieces of crap you'd see at nowhere drive-ins back in the day.  Those old movies never had the resources of good special effects, actors, or scripts, so they made up for it with exploitative elements that would bring in the youthful audiences looking for a cheap thrill.  Grindhouse combines all the resources of talent and money with the exploitative elements of grindhouse film, and the result is a deceptively terrible masterpiece.

First is Robert Rodriguez's Planet Terror, about a sort-of zombie attack.  And when it comes to the stylistic craft of spectacle, Rodriguez is a Grandmaster.  To discuss this in any further specifics would be a disservice to anyone who hasn't yet seen it for themselves.

Second is Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof, about a stuntman who kills people with his car.  This movie is cascading with Tarantino dialogue, all delivered in that inimitable Tarantino style.  The incredible car chase kicks your ass all over the place, and what Tarantino does with the structure of this movie is reason alone for it to exist.

Preceding both movies is a handful of fake grindhouse-style trailers, made specifically for Grindhouse by some guest directors.  These trailers are every bit as crucial a part of the Grindhouse experience as its two feature attractions.

Wanna own it?  Because Grindhouse didn't make as much money at the box office as the studio wanted it to, they split it up into the two individual movies, with most of the trailers omitted.  I think this is a colossal betrayal of the movie's intent and spirit, but who gives a shit what I think, right?  Click here to separately buy Planet Terror and Death Proof.


2007, like any other year, saw a lot of sequels.  Without consulting any kind of comprehensive database, I can think of about five part 2's, a couple of part 4's, and even a part 5.  But there was at least seven part 3's.  So we can probably officially call it the Year of the Threquels.  I saw six of them.  Liked three or four.  But only saw fit to include two on this list.  And Bourne Ultimatum was the undisputed champ.

The Bourne Identity was pretty flawless.  It was directed by action champ Doug Liman, whom I refer to as such even though he thinks of his three (unrelated) action films as his "sellout trilogy."  It was also co-written by thriller champ Tony Gilroy.  Understated and badass, The Bourne Identity reminded us that action movies need not be mindless adrenaline fuck parties.  Or, at least, that they need not just be that.

The Bourne Supremacy and The Bourne Ultimatum were directed by Paul Greengrass, with Gilroy still co-writing.  They expanded on the original in smart and unpredictable ways.  And although the trilogy is supposedly nothing like the books it's based on, it is one of the most solid trilogies in recent history.  Like most of the entries on this list, I've deftly skirted all plot details.  This is so that anyone who reads this and is shamed into watching all three Bourne movies immediately will be able to go in totally fresh.

By the way, my favorite action movie last year was also a threquel, and it was also right around here on the list.  I swear to god I didn't do that on purpose.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy The Bourne Ultimatum.


I think most people have the same reaction to Juno when they see it.  At first, it seems to be a little too much with the quirky indie vibe and the cutesy stylized dialogue.  But as the movie progresses and you become acclimated to the universe, you completely forget those first few awkward steps.  It's almost as if Diablo Cody wrote the movie sequentially, and learned to write as she was doing so.

I enjoy this kind of movie.  We're introduced to a series of interesting characters and basically just watch them interact through a very basic timeline-driven plot.  The outcomes of these relationships are surprising with minimal contrivance, and Juno herself is an overwhelming delight, in how she is written, directed, and performed.  I'd say one of the most memorable characters in all of 2007.  And that's a long goddamn hypothetical list.

People will get angry when they see this on my list.  Juno came out to uproarious critical acclaim.  And you'd think that's a good thing.  But acclaim leads to hype and Oscar buzz, which leads to a venomous backlash, which is basically a wave of hatred that is just as powerful as the love that preceded it.  It's Newton's third law.

So first it was cool to like Juno, and then it was cool to look down on it.  Like Borat, and Napoleon Dynamite before him (not exactly terrible company).  But here's the bottom line.  Juno is not perfect.  But it has too many good things in it to ignore.  So shut the fuck up and enjoy the fucking movie, you idiots!

By the way, my favorite action movie/threquel last year was also immediately followed by an overhyped comedy.  I swear to god I didn't do that on purpose.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Juno.  And for more Juno-related fun, click here to buy Juno: The Soundtrack and Juno: The Shooting Script.


I saw There Will Be Blood in the middle of a really heavy streak of bad audiences.  Like, I'd always sit in front of a row of really chatty friends, or next to a guy who laughed at character deaths.  In the case of There Will Be Blood, it was an entire theater of people who were witnessing a very dark story and were desperate to laugh at anything, and would therefore jump at every opportunity for a chuckle.  That means they laughed at everything in this movie that even resembled a joke.  And while there are some legitimate laughs in the movie, not all of them are ha-ha funny.  A lot of them are like, scary funny.  And I'm the type of viewer that can appreciate the humor of something without automatically having to guffaw about it.  So that was a big pain in the ass.  I'm only telling you this story as the first step in what I anticipate will be a very long campaign where I rid the world of inappropriate movie theater laughter.  You're welcome.

This is a stunning movie.  Daniel Day-Lewis creates a performance that will sear itself into your soul, and Paul Dano completely holds his ground opposite him.  The script is bold and smart.  And if I had to think of a 2007 release that perfectly summarizes why we go to the movies, I would say it's this one.  And maybe five others before it.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy There Will Be Blood.  You can also buy the There Will Be Blood Soundtrack, or read Upton Sinclair's Oil!, upon which the movie is based, although I don't think the book is anything like the movie.


Back in the early aughts, when Pixar had yet to be officially acquired by Disney, Michael Eisner saw a troubled rough cut of Finding Nemo and told his Disney guys to hold off on making Pixar an offer, because he figured they could get a much better deal once Pixar released this bomb.  But what he couldn't have known at the time was that Pixar doesn't bomb, ever.  The only clues he had at his disposal were the four massive hits and zero failures that Pixar had already released.  But he would eventually come to realize what the world now knows for sure-- even the worst Pixar movie is still better than you can possibly imagine.

Maybe there's something about the process of rendering the most beautiful computer animation ever seen by human eyes that makes you a better storyteller.  Maybe the halls of Pixar just happen to be filled with geniuses.  Whatever it is, there's a reason this was one of the best reviewed movies of 2007, across the board.  If you haven't seen it, hit yourself.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Ratatouille.


I loved the shit out of The Darjeeling Limited.  It's about three brothers on a train.

Wes Anderson has one of the most original and distinct voices in American cinema today.  His dialogue, his comedic timing, and basically all aspects of his directorial sensibilities are collective proof that God exists and He wants to lavish us with gifts.  Anderson's previous works include Bottle Rocket (which I saw, but can barely remember), Rushmore (which is great and changed the world forever), The Royal Tenenbaums (which I particularly enjoyed quite a bit), The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou (which I've really wanted to see since it came out, but for some reason, have not), and an awesome American Express commercial that kills every other commercial ever made.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy The Darjeeling Limited.


Christian Bale.  Russell Crowe.  Ben Foster.  Gretchen Mol.  Cowboys.  Gunfights.  A story that defines true honor even as it redefines itself.  Badassery.  3:10 to Yuma.

This is actually a remake.  I've never seen the 1957 original, but I'd be willing to bet that this new version makes it look like dogshit.  And I know I said earlier that my favorite action film of the year was The Bourne Ultimatum.  But isn't this also an action film?  No, it's a Western.  You like how I anticipate your every question and then answer it?  Yes.

Also, the score is by Marco Beltrami, whose previous work includes the masterful score to the Scream trilogy.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy 3:10 to Yuma.  And if you want, click here to buy the original 3:10 to Yuma.


With a resplendent symphony of words and visuals, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford reveals the stark reality of the legend cited in its title.  Everything about this movie is superb.

Also, the score is by Nick Cave, whose previous work includes the song "Red Right Hand," which serves as the creepy theme of the Scream trilogy.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford.  But maybe you want to read the book it's based on.  Click here for The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford: A Novel.


No Country for Old Men is Mary Poppins.  Practically perfect in every way.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy No Country for Old Men.  Wanna read the book?  Click here to buy Cormac McCarthy's No Country for Old Men.


Because you have been a patient and well-behaved reader (and I am totally guessing on that), you get a bonus entry.  Bender's Big Score is the best direct-to-video movie of 2007.

Futurama was one of the best TV shows of the past couple millennia.  It was disgustingly sabotaged by the very network that gave it life and unceremoniously put to sleep.  It was only when syndication reruns and DVD sales skyrocketed that FOX decided it was good enough to bring back in a series of direct-to-DVD movies.  This is the first of four, and it's incredible.  An epic sci-fi tale so full of twists and paradoxes, you're struggling to comprehend it long after the credits have rolled.  The writers of Futurama have always believed in writing for the smartest people in the room, and that is why it is so engaging, even after multiple viewings.

There are lots of references to past episodes, to the extent that I would only recommend this movie to people who have seen all four seasons of Futurama.  Not because new viewers wouldn't enjoy the movie by itself, but because they would then enjoy it that much more.

Futurama: The Beast with a Billion Backs comes out this June.  Snap.

Wanna own it?  Click here to buy Futurama: Bender's Big Score.  And click here to buy Futurama, Volumes One, Two, Three, and Four.

And that's the best of 2007.  So if ever you want to relive the good times of 2007, just read this.  Now, I know what you're thinking.  What if you want to relive the bad times of 2007?

What? 

-- Diego Kontarovsky

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